Friday, August 11, 2006
  Cold Turkey
Dear all,

I would like to share some thoughts with you. Some thoughts I had the morning after I got home from my lonesome journey (of course nothing compared to Ivo's escape from Alcatraz), but lonesome it was. Extra lonesome because of our busy and adventures times in a not so distant past.

I knew I had woken up that morning without the idea everybody was against me. It was raining. The garden looked a bit lost. The chair was still upside down. In the same position it stopped moving after hitting the floor. The kitchen was messy. The doorknob from the backdoor stuck out of a painting. In the middle of a painted fountain. The carpet on which I normally did my research asked for attention. It didn’t have a special reason to do that. The carpet on which I did my research was asking for attention for months before I left. That was nothing special. A needle was sticking out of a shoebox, dried orange peelings lay on a, at first sight, average drawing of a couch, a thread was stretched between a mug and a pan, two matchboxes were keeping each other balanced as the roof of a house, from the ceiling a measuring-tape was hanging and pieces of gum stuck to it, a painted egg-box made sure the door to the hallway stayed open. In a corner a brown vase was standing, in another corner a curtain I had always used as a blanket, covered the floor. From today on that wouldn’t be necessary anymore. I was going to buy a sleeping-bag and a decent mattress, I was going to buy gloves to do the dishes and a bucket. I would buy bread. Fresh bread, milk and a newspaper. Later on I would go to the cinema or even the theatre, and after that I would maybe go to a bar or visit friends I hadn’t seen in ages. I would call people to make appointments and maybe have a look at my old primary school. Was the climbing-frame still there? The roof of the building still steep? The walk to the shopping mall about seven minutes? Maybe I would have a passport photo taken at the train station. I would pick up things from the street or just leave it where it was and look at it for a while.

Love, Frank
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'Hopes and fears' is sponsored by STEP beyond mobility fund http://www.eurocult.org

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